How To Know What Makes You Happy

how to know what makes you happy

What makes you happy? Have you ever asked this question to yourself?

Life is a rollercoaster of instinctual emotions. However, happiness is the only feeling among them all that is ever so elusive.

To experience pure inner bliss in everyday life, you must consciously identify your distinctive sources of joy before you starting squandering your energy on useless solutions that lead you to momentary bliss.

If you are ready to start your pursuit of happiness, here’s a foolproof set of guidelines that can help you in this enlightening quest for self-discovery.

Identify Moments You Wish to Live Again 

how to know what makes you happy

Pull out your old photo album. See yourself as a child. Look at the delightful smile on your face that is untouched by fake digital filters.

Now, dissect your memories and try to remember what caused that smile on your face. Was it the first time you experienced the sea, or was it a fun day at the petting zoo?

Was it your crayon masterpiece that just got appreciated, or was it a beautiful little bird at your window?

Deep down inside, you are the same person. So, go right ahead and make a trip to the petting zoo again. Maybe, you love animals; and helping them or simply being with them makes you happy.

Try painting a masterpiece. Maybe, the rush of colours and the feeling of a paintbrush on a blank canvas fills up an invisible gap in your life.

Go to the sea and admire the waves again. Maybe, the majestic aura and bounty of nature is your true soul therapy.  

Once you go down the memory lane and identify some of the key happiness elements you have rediscovered in the path, try remodelling your lifestyle and career around these elements.

One fine day you will realize that happiness has become a sort of permanent state of your mind. 

Identify Energy Vampires Around You And Give Them Some Garlic

how to know what makes you happy

Have you heard of energy vampires?

Basically, these are people in your life that appear important, but they drain your creative, productive and healing energies at the end of the day.

They leave you with zero motivation and eventually causing severe mental and emotional trauma.

Here’s a quick checklist that can help you identify Energy Vampires around you:

  • They are way too demanding and overbearing.
  • They criticize mindlessly to breed insecurity in you.
  • They design the goals you may not agree with and push you towards achieving them.
  • They are Exhibit A of Martyrs’ Syndrome.
  • Guilt trips and ultimatums are their weapons to drive you to do what they want you to do.
  • They feed off your emotions and use your vulnerabilities against you.

Unfortunately, these people can be very close friends, family members and even your partner/spouse.

Once you identify such people, try setting healthy boundaries so that they cannot disturb your inner peace.

If required, disengage with them completely. 

Once these energy black holes are put in their place, you can discover your sources of true happiness with absolute clarity.

Unburden Your Mind From Predefined Notions of Happiness

how to know what makes you happy

When your mind is already crammed with predefined and socially stipulated notions of happiness, there is a rare possibility you will ever discover your true source of contentment.

For example, you are above 30 and love your single life. You love traveling and meeting new people. You love helping at the local animal shelter; you love spending time alone and reading.

And at the end of the day, you almost always have a song on your lips and a smile on your face. But society says single life is a selfish life. You must find a spouse and settle down.

You must have children and experience the joy of watching them grow. Slowly, you begin to doubt your existing source of happiness and try to remodel your life in tune with society’s pre-postulated ideas.

As years go by, you see yourself losing interest in this superimposed ‘family life’ and descending into serious boredom, loneliness, and depression, which eventually leads to a nasty divorce.

This is only one out of the many cases of happy people worldwide who have become victims of such societal bullying.

The solution is to turn a deaf ear to what society has to say and keep doing what brings a smile to your face.

It may be difficult in the beginning, but it is essential for your inner wellbeing.

Also read: Comparison Is The Thief Of Joy

Question Yourself Often 

how to know what makes you happy

Did you know that conversing with yourself in your mind is a very healthy habit?

This is, in fact, one of the best ways to know what makes you truly happy, something even certified therapists cannot help with.

When you go to bed at night, make it a point to ask yourself certain questions and answer them honestly.

For example, ask yourself

  • Are you content with the things you possess?
  • Did that super expensive cocktail dinner actually make you feel good?
  • Are you really happy with your family life, or is it a routine you are keeping up with?
  • Have you disengaged with your hobbies, fearing the judgment of your family/friends’ circle?
  • Did you major in that subject because you actually love that subject, or your family insisted that you should?
  • If a Fairy Godmother magically appears to you and blesses you with a new life, would you choose what you have at the moment, or would you re-do everything from scratch?

Pay very close attention to your answers because every baggage you discard in your mind is an actual tangible burden in your real life.

It is necessary to immediately address these roadblocks because discarding unnecessary baggage is the only way to discover what makes you truly happy. 

The Bottom Line

Happiness is one of those indispensable driving forces that often answers the ‘WHYs’ in your existential crisis. It helps you gain clarity on who you are and channel your energy towards pertinent life goals that will surely bring out the best in you.

Don’t wait for a revelation. Embark on your quest right away to experience a journey of self-discovery you will never regret.

Also read : 5 Habits That Are Ruining Your Happiness