As human beings, we are driven by various factors like survival, purpose, ambition, and pleasure but also, sometimes, pain!
Experts have researched and concluded that emotional or physical pain when it has the power, can stop you from moving forward in a growth-oriented way.
But take the power in your hands, and it can be one of the most powerful drivers of your life.
How to let go of the past? How to let go of the hurt? How to move on? These are some of the questions we have asked ourselves over and over again and especially when we are neck-deep in pain.
Letting go is not at all easy. It’s like a push and pull. And you need to dance along with this rhythmic push and pull before you attain the threshold energy to take a leap of faith and finally jump in with both feet on the way toward the future.
Letting go takes courage because familiarity with pain and hurt is comforting, and you don’t know what you will be stepping into.
Yes, there’ll be light at the end of the tunnel, but it’s also scary because you don’t know what you will find in that light.
Yes, it’ll give you a second chance, a tabula rasa, but you will be unsure what you want to fill it with.
If you are also having a hard time with unprocessed pain, this article will help you start your life afresh.
Table of Contents
Make Letting Go of the Past an Absolute “MUST”
Understand why letting go is necessary for you and what is holding you back from moving on. It could be a failed relationship, flights from close friends or family, or the need to ask forgiveness from someone (whether directly or in your heart) before moving forward.
Once you understand why letting go of the past is difficult, ask yourself these questions:
“Why is letting go so important to me? Will my life change if I move beyond it? How? What experiences await as I embark upon this new chapter in my life?”
As one of the critical aspects of any process, setting goals can help keep you focused and overcome past disappointments. Setting clear and attainable objectives will act as your motivation against obstacles or setbacks.
Recognize Your Emotional Habits
One of the most challenging steps to move on from the past is identifying your emotional patterns. This requires an honest, in-depth examination of how you live your life. Which beliefs limit or stop you? Where are your emotional boundaries drawn?
Everyone has habits that can be positive or negative. As we grow accustomed to certain moods, such as negative ones, it can be hard to recognize their daily impact.
Our emotional patterns greatly influence our perception of life, behavior, and efforts toward moving on from past hurts. Why settle for living an existence which feeds into negative patterns while suppressing positive ones?
Acknowledging our emotions is the first step toward making them more pleasurable. They’re like muscles. Over time, you may become conditioned to feel a certain way when experiencing complex events.
But by becoming aware of our thoughts and controlling our feelings, we can let go of past trauma more peacefully instead of feeling fearful and angry about it all over again.
Condition Your Mind
To experience significant breakthroughs in life, the most successful people use strategies, stories, and motivational techniques to take steps forward proactively. Daily training your mind requires effortful discipline – not always easy to feel comfortable with.
This training aims at ditching negative self-talk for positive and empowering beliefs, which help boost rather than pull back down.
If you don’t make time to review and modify your lifestyle, no matter how smart, knowledgeable, or enthusiastic you may be, things begin to happen to you rather than for you.
Create inspiring narratives instead of negative ones for yourself. Feed your mind with new information and positivity from all sources.
Surround yourself with people who can support and propel you toward greater heights of achievement; cultivate an abundant garden rather than an empty patch of weeds!
Establish Empowering Rituals
Letting go of past traumas can be difficult, but rituals can help your garden to flourish. Successful people all rely on daily rituals such as eating nutritious breakfasts, exercising, meditation, and acquiring new knowledge.
Establishing daily rituals builds momentum that can eventually lead to significant transformation. Start each day right by engaging in a powerful cleansing ritual that incorporates meditation and visualization.
Meditation can help reduce stress levels while keeping you grounded in the present. Make sure to eat well and exercise regularly.
Recognize that every event in your past shaped who you are today.
Shift Your Focus
Much of our suffering stems from believing we have control over how others act and feel. Our experiences often seem to come from outside forces, but they’re often caused by ourselves!
Negative experiences can become positive by turning setbacks into opportunities and mistakes into lessons learned. All we are responsible for in life are our own actions and choices.
What others are doing factors outside our sphere of responsibility?
Reversing past relationships may be impossible, but you can learn from them and take those lessons forward in your future relationships.
Every day presents the chance to start over. By breaking away from old routines and creating the life you desire instead of regretting those you had before, letting go of past hurts becomes easier to accept.
Teach Yourself to Be Present
You must learn to live in the present. Remember that only what is happening now matters. Your future dreams don’t exist in reality, and memories may contain lies.
The only thing real is what’s taking place right now, and nothing works better than human spirits anchored to today without regard to past or future happenings.
Being present can bring great pleasure to you and those around you. Your friends and family benefit when your presence is felt more keenly, which in turn strengthens your relationships.
Learn to be present if you want to experience greater joy, satisfaction, and happiness in your daily life. Focus on being in the present rather than being distracted by technology. Put away past experiences. Let go.
Focus your mind on now. The key to successfully moving on from them is to be mindful in every moment – no matter the outcome.
Begin Working On Personal Growth
Learning and development don’t just offer ways of banishing negative thoughts – they provide opportunities for personal empowerment too!
Spend some time thinking through if career advancement is your goal or perhaps creating healthy and lasting relationships is more of a priority.
Once you’ve identified areas, you wish to focus on, identify any obstacles and gather the tools needed for success. At this stage, you can consider hiring an expert coach as part of your personal development journey.
Journaling can be an extremely effective tool. Writing down your thoughts can help identify what’s holding you back. It will help you process your own emotions.
Practicing gratitude can aid in living more in the present rather than dwelling on past regrets. Start a gratitude notebook or dedicate 15 minutes a morning before bed to remember all the good things in your life.
This can give you insight into letting go of the past and focusing on living fully today.
Surround Yourself With Positive People
What is the difference between those who achieve their goals and those who don’t? It isn’t time or skill. Instead, it is their ability to use the law of attraction to reach their objectives effectively.
They understand that whatever we focus our energy on will determine our experience of the world.
Unburdening yourself of the past can be challenging when surrounded by people reminding you of that past. By elevating the peers within your life and surrounding yourself with positive people who support growth and development, letting go of memories should become much more straightforward.
After all, “The quality of a person’s life often reflects expectations set by peers.”
Let go of the past but do not forget to move forward with life. Find something bigger than yourself that needs your time and effort.
Try giving back to the family or community service; serve humanity itself. Motivation does matter, so seek motivations greater than yourself to get moving again.
There’ll always be someone ready to listen if you are ready to talk. Once you understand that giving back can transform your life, it will be easy for you to shed past burdens.
Your life matters, and if you focus on giving back instead, people will sense this genuineness and open up more freely to you.
Giving back is a reminder of why we were created in the first place. Being mindful of others’ demands could even enable you to surpass previous expectations!
Letting go is not about forgetting but more about acceptance. The process will not undo the things that have already happened or erase your memory, but with the right intentions, patience, and courage, it’s possible to make amends with your past.
You can make peace with your choices so that you can welcome the future with open arms. And while in the process, remember that it will not be linear, and time will be your best friend. Use this how to let go of the past guide and let your healing journey begin.
Also read: How To Make A Narcissist Fear You